When Making Art Becomes Living It by Richa Rudola

A reflection on the making of Cow Heavy and Floral and the birth of Meals About Motherhood

EDITOR'S NOTE: This a standalone newsletter by #OTVAtlas fund Ambassador, Richa Rudola, chronicling the backstory of her film, Cow Heavy and Floral.

Cow Heavy and Floral is a split-screen film about a postpartum writer struggling to make a deadline as she experiences an identity crisis between her various personas.

Cow Heavy and Floral Trailer 

This month marks two years to when we shot the mission-based film Cow Heavy And Floral - “a film by parents” - even while we were raising money to be able to walk the walk. At the time I had already spent over a year writing the script and finessing the story. But life has a way of teaching you that the themes you think you're exploring through the distance of art are actually the ones you're living through in your own skin.

At first, making "Cow Heavy And Floral" wasn't really a choice—it was a necessity, to help me recompose myself from the long and debilitating spell of postpartum depression. I needed to create this film to survive, both as an artist and as a mother. Storytelling became my lifeline - and my core collaborators, Lela Meadow-Conner and Robin Rose Singer, were the ones who helped me hold on, weaving their strength and artistry into the process of making sense of experiences that felt overwhelming.

Richa Rudola directing Cow Heavy And Floral on set in Los Angeles 

Learning to Keep the Show Going

We launched our crowdfunding campaign for the film a month before production. This meant we were raising money to pay our cast & crew even while peak pre-production was underway. That alone was enough to keep me on my toes, on top of juggling a part time job and caring for my toddler. And then I found myself navigating some unexpectedly painful interactions with family members - moments where harsh judgments left me feeling wounded and questioning not just my work, but my worth. 

What surprised me wasn't the pain itself, but how my mind responded. Almost immediately, I began to prioritize. Without any conscious decision, my attention focused on what the work needed while other concerns seemed to fade into the background. I began to realize this may be the universe’s way of telling me that I’m not only making this film, but also living it.

My family - my husband and my mother who visited from India - stepped up in incredible ways during this time, taking on household responsibilities so I could pour my energy into the film. Their support became this foundation that allowed me to develop what I can only describe as a thicker skin, a kind of resilience I didn't know I possessed. It wasn't denial or avoidance - it felt more like survival in its most creative form.

I was and am incredibly proud that we were able to support the working parents on our film team even while creating space to question the very lack of systemic supports to enable more working parents to remain in the film & tv industry. Even on set, many crew members discussed the themes of the story and how the film and the supporting dialogue felt vital and timely.

Partial Cast & Crew of Cow Heavy And Floral after Day 3 of filming on set in Los Angeles 

The Shift from Judgement to Curiosity

More than developing resilience, the difficult moments taught me something essential about choice - specifically, the choice we have in how we approach other people's stories, their struggles, their imperfections. I realized I could meet someone from a place of judgment, or I could choose curiosity. This shift became the seed for everything that followed.

How many of us have been in positions where we were swift to lead with judgment, especially when it came to the choices others make about raising their families? I can distinctly recall several moments from my life, conversations from friends in high school, college, even in my 30s, where I have.

In the years of developing the film I’ve had countless conversations with friends, colleagues, acquaintances and strangers where I became more and more aware of the blurry lines between judgment and curiosity and how easily the choice can be made with intention on which side to listen from.  These conversations were the seeds for Meals About Motherhood (MAM), a companion initiative to the film to forge dialogue alongside discovery. 

Every MAM event - whether my co-hosts or I are hosting solo or partnering with organizations like Park Slope Parents - is built on the belief that mothers' stories deserve to be met with genuine curiosity rather than quick assessment. If you’re interested in hosting your own Meal About Motherhood, click here.

Inaugural round of Meals About Motherhood hosted across 15+ cities in US and Canada

From Film to Movement

Since its premieres at Tasveer Film Festival and Athena Film Festival, Cow Heavy And Floral has traveled widely — screening at 8 film festivals across the U.S. and Canada (including an upcoming screening at the Lincoln Center in New York), sparking dialogue in 3 national and state-level braintrusts with policy and maternal health experts representing 19 states, and partnering with 2 nonprofits supporting parents nationwide. The film has also inspired more than 15 Meals About Motherhood gatherings across North America, been featured at a national maternal health conference, and even reached the workplace through an employee resource group event.

Richa Rudola with Best Mom-Themed Film Jury Award at the 2025 MOM Film Fest

As the film continues to find its way in the world and MAM has grown, sharing this story serves a different purpose. Recently - thanks to the leadership of our impact producer, Emily Branham - we created an impact reel for Cow Heavy And Floral that captures some of what the film has meant to people, how it has resonated, and the conversations it has sparked. Watching it, I’m struck by how the personal necessity that drove me to make the film has become a bridge for others to examine their own relationships with judgment and curiosity, with resilience and community.

Making Cow Heavy And Floral taught me that creating art isn’t separate from living it. The film became a kind of laboratory - a space to test resilience, to seek community, and to practice choosing curiosity over judgment. MAM became the vessel where those explorations could breathe among real people, a gathering place for the truths and worries too easily buried in the rigmarole of daily life. Sometimes it’s only in a curated space, among near-strangers, that the hardest truths find their voice.

Cow Heavy and Floral Impact Reel

The #OTVAtlas grant from Open Television didn’t just fund our social impact path; it nurtured a journey of discovery that continues to unfold with every story shared, every meal hosted, every moment a caregiver realizes they are not alone. It supported work that needed to be made - and in doing so, it seeded a process of growth that extends far beyond a single project.

This journey started with one story but now belongs to many. With each story shared and each meal hosted, the circle widens.

The film’s upcoming screenings include the 2025 International South Asian Film Festival (iSAFF) Vancouver (September 27), 2025 Kansas National Breastfeeding Coalition, Wichita (October 15) and 2025 Tallgrass Film Festival, Wichita (October 16 and 19). Richa Rudola and her impact advisor Charlene SanJenko will also co-host Surrey’s first Meals About Motherhood following the iSAFF screening (more information here).

I hope you’ll join us in shaping the next chapter at www.CowHeavyAndFloral.com.

"Cow Heavy And Floral" film and Meals About Motherhood initiative are a proud Impact Grantee with Open Television Atlas Fund which supports authentic voices and community-centered storytelling. To learn more, visit: www.CowHeavyAndFloral.com

Richa Rudola is an award-winning filmmaker and statistician whose work blends emotional truth with intellectual depth. With Cow Heavy And Floral and the Meals About Motherhood initiative, she bridges art and activism - sparking conversations around parenting, caregiving, and identity. The film has been honored with the OTV Atlas Social Impact Grant and Best Mom-Themed Film at the 2025 MOM Film Festival.